Domestic Violence Program
How can you help?
The Domestic Violence Shelter is always in need of various items for the women and children at the shelter. Listed in the Domestic Violence Shelter Wish List are some items that would be greatly appreciated. You can drop off donations at Family Service Association, 618 S. Main Street in Kokomo. Thank you for your support!
Facts About Domestic Violence
- Every nine seconds a woman in the U.S. is beaten by her current or former husband or intimate partner.
- The FBI states that between 1,500 and 2,000 female murder victims are murdered each year by a current or former partner.
- 81% of men who batter had fathers who abused their mothers.
- Children raised in violent homes are 74% more likely to commit assaults.
- It has been estimated that 80% of the young men between 13 and 17 years old who are incarcerated are there due to an assault or murder against their mother's abuser.
- 81% of women with a history of suicide attempts had experienced domestic violence at some point in their lives.
- 20% of all emergency room visits by women are the result of domestic violence and 75% of these women will have additional injuries requiring treatment within a year.
- During a recent study, it was found that approximately half of the women on death row were there for the murder of an abusive partner.
- The average number of times for a woman to leave an abuser before she finds a way to stay out is seven. Often they feel that the legal and social service systems are tired of helping her.
Who Are The Victims
Domestic violence is a social epidemic that touches the lives of women (and men in some cases) of all ages, races, religions, educational backgrounds and socioeconomic status. No one is totally immune and although most people want to think it only affects others, these victims could be your mother, daughter, sister, best friend or co-worker. If you consider the fact that a woman is beaten every nine seconds by a former or current intimate partner, that totals over 22 million attacks per year and you more than likely know at least one of these victims.
Why Don't They Just Leave?
Victims do not stay with abusers because they enjoy being abused. This is a myth. There are many reasons why victims do not leave the situation.
- She may never be alone with the children to get them out.
- She may fear violence is she leaves. Statistics show that the victim's chance of being murdered increases by 70% after she leaves the abuser.
- She may not have the resources to support herself and her children.
- She may not have family support, or in some cases her family may even stand behind the abuser.
- She may believe the threats that have been made about taking away the children or harming people that she cares for if she tries to leave.
- Maybe the biggest reason of all, is that she loves him and believes that things will change if she tries hard enough.
What Is Abusive Behavior
Domestic violence does not always mean beatings and a victim that is black and blue. This is the picture that comes to most people's minds. The fact is that physical abuse is only one form of the control and terror that these victims may face everyday. There is emotional abuse, financial abuse, sexual abuse, control of friends and family and even control in the workplace. A great deal of this is accomplished through threats against the victim, her children or others. Victims of abuse may encounter one or any combination of those listed. Most repetitive abusers are very careful about not leaving visible signs on their victims.
Who Are The Abusers
Being abusive is a learned behavior. In over 80% of all cases, an abuser was raised in an abusive home and if things don't change, they will raise their own children to do the same. Often an abuser may be seen as a nice, normal, family man, who is really protective and watches out for his family, but the victim knows the truth!
It is important to remember that although most abusive relationships involve a man being abusive to a woman, that is not always the case. A woman can also be an abuser and abuse is sometimes very severe in same-sex relationships. In these cases there are still victims and abusers and often children are still caught in the middle of the Cycle of Violence.
Advocates trained in crisis intervention are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week to answer questions and assist in crisis intervention.
4 lesson, 3 lesson, or 1 lesson curriculums are available to be taught at middle schools and high schools. Curriculums are adaptations of Hazelden’s research based curriculum called Safe Dates.
Shelter Care is offered for 45 days to those who are seeking safety from violence. The Shelter is only a crisis intervention program, not a long term program. After the end of 45 days, clients must either enter another program or enter permanent housing.
The Domestic Violence Program has several scatter-site apartments that provide housing for victims for up to twelve months while they are transitioning out of shelter care. There is limited availability for the Transitional Housing Program and all clients must complete the 45 day crisis stay and complete and application before being considered.
All shelter residents are required to attend support groups on Tuesdays and Thursdays at 10 a.m. The support groups are open to anyone who has experienced domestic violence even if they are not currently a resident of the shelter.
Case Managers are available to meet with clients to give information, referrals and guidance for clients who are in the process or have already left an abusive relationship. Case management services are available to anyone who may have questions about Domestic violence even if they are not currently a resident of the shelter.